Friday, February 13, 2009

Tomorrow We Say Goodbye To A Friend,

I sit here tonight in a surreal mood. Something that feels like I have just been on a creepy amusement park ride, and I am waiting in line for another weird thrill. It is sad and scared and lost all at the same time.

It isn't that often a person has to say the next words about one of their friends, at our age.....anyway.....but.......

On Monday night one of our friends died suddenly and tragically. The shock of the news on Tuesday morning was enough to make our hearts stop.

Our friend Paul Bruton was the husband of my friend Norma. In late 2005 or early 2006 Norma and I became fast friends as we worked on our recoveries from neurological injury. Paul and Norma and Carl and I have hung out ever since. (well as much as Norma and I have been able to hang out anyhow).

It was because of Norma's yarn shop that I recovered as well as I did. Knitting was part of my physical therapy and rehabilitation, and I spent many many days at the shop.

Paul was an Ontario Yarn rep, so most every yarn shop in Ontario has had him pass through their front door. He really knew his fibre!

Paul was a very nice guy. I know that all the yarn people I know thought the world of him, and I know Norma really counted on him a lot these last years as she has not been so well. Norma would always joke that she really needed him around cuz she can't cook to save her life, but I know it was more than that. He treated her Mom like a queen and really respected her friends, and was easy to get along with. I think he helped her balance most of the time.

I know what that is like. Cuz I tend to be all over the place and Carl pulls me back to reality when my mind swoops me into the obcessive weirdness of my artsyism where time stands still and my world is caught up in my imagination.

Carl and I have been stuck in a rut all week. Feeling quiet and dull while thinking about Paul. It is hard to believe I won't watch him walk into the shop with his ear-to-ear smile and a story. It is hard to believe we won't go over to the house and sit around the kitchen table for hours gabbing about nothing in particular........

One of our buddies is gone.

You don't really prepare yourself for the death of a friend. It is just a little too close to the home age where we all have to think about it but never really want to....Reminding us that we have to live for the now and not keep putting off stuff with excuses of next time or next year, or next week.

So with this promise to Paul before we say goodbye tomorrow....that we will live for NOW....and no longer wait...


RheLynn said...

I'm sorry for your loss and hope you all pull together in your good memories of your friend.

RennyBA said...

Dear Lynn, I'm so sorry about your loss. I so much understand you will miss this wonderful person. Your words are heart touching - what a great contribution.

Inn the sadness, its important to remember the good memories and you've proved there is a lot of them.